Category: Joke Board
The Top 12 Ways to Improve Doctor/Nurse Relations
12> The practice of congratulating surgeons on a job well done
by dumping bedpans over their heads will be abolished.
11> Simple: Put the doctors at one hospital and the nurses
at another.
10> After three write-ups, doctors must take behavior-modifying
drugs. (The "drugs" are just placebos, but they are
administered in suppository form by the complaining nurses.)
9> Random paycheck and schedule swaps!
8> Doctors who prescribe meds that make patients puke will be
required to answer stat pages to clean it up.
7> Goodbye "Casual Fridays."
Hello "Stethoscope-and-Hospital-Gown-Only Fridays!"
6> Every time the tele monitor pings, everybody does a shot.
5> "Hide the tongue depressor" contests will now be
professionally judged.
4> Each doctor will spend two shifts per week changing bedpans
for $18 per hour. Each nurse will spend two shifts per
week rounding on patients for $300 per five-minute visit.
3> Doctors will dispense with condescending and haughty attitudes
and treat the nursing staff like valued human beings.
Nurses will refrain from using nicknames such as "Dr. Dumbass"
in front of patients.
2> Surgeons and residents rounding on the unit are now required
to inhale helium before sharing their opinions on patient care
with the nursing staff.
and the Number 1 Way
to Improve Doctor/Nurse Relations...
1> The unit displaying the most improvement in doctor/nurse
relations each week will get to beat the crap out of the
hospital administrator of its choice.
lol very nice.
sweet my mom would love that one
loved numbers 1, 3, and the one about stethoscope-and-hospital-gown-only Fridays lol should show this to my friend who's a CNA